I didn't really care about how I looked like until the near end of 2017. The holiday season was all about reuniting with family, old friends, and of course, tons of good food. *Amen* It also meant hearing every paraphrased version of "ang taba mo na". I'm used to getting that impression but this time, it felt alarming. (As in lahat ng nakakausap ko, ganoon na ang sinasabi.) That was when it struck me.

As I have been writing this, I realized that I have long lacked confidence in my body.
I rarely posted photos of myself on social media. I was hesitant about going out of the house during vacations, afraid that maybe an elementary or high school classmate would see me. I lurked with my insecurities in fitting rooms as the clothes I wanted to wear didn't fit me. I felt inferior to the other girls in the same generation. Perhaps the difficulty of looking for these pictures from two months ago (or older) pretty much resonated that.

I subscribed to a gym membership for a month before but I stopped after eight days. It turned out my injured knee couldn't handle exercising/working out. I also lacked self-discipline. My mom constantly reminded me to get the prescribed hours of sleep but the maximum I was getting was five. It's either because I'm studying or because I delved too deep in the K-World *insert Ma, sorry Ma meme here*. I regularly ate in fastfood chains in the hopes of eating tipid food which was actually a big fat fad. In short, I couldn't live a healthy lifestyle because of my choices and my inconsistencies.

And so this year, I planned a new year's resolution: #SelfLove2018 ❤which is by far the simplest yet greatest gift that I could ever give myself.

Thanks to my friend, Bianne-tha, I was introduced to my ever supportive coaches at the Nutrition Club, Enzo and Julia (also our cutest OTP wink wink) + Russell and that changed me not just physically, but also with my habits. Finally, I can make smart decisions for myself and I've become a whole lotta healthier! 🎉🎉🎉

In the first 10 days, minus 5.2 pounds. Now, I've already lost 13.2 pounds in 1.5 months and more importantly, improved in other health parameters like body&visceral fat, water percentage, and metabolic age (coz weight is not everything, my brother) BUT the journey towards a healthier life continues.

*Cardo is shaking*

Finally, my dear self, I'm proud of you for taking on this challenge and now I can say, I love you more ❤❤❤ #LoveYourself

Edit: I started this program primarily based on a preventive measure for my knee pain due to a recurring injury. I would like to shut down issues about me doing this for the sake of aesthetics ONLY. As I was trying it out, I felt the changes within me which I believe is shown with data naman. I have no intentions of body shaming; instead, I would like to emphasize that we have different forms of acceptance and love for ourselves. It just so happens that mine is about being healthier on the INSIDE (because what you see in the surface is NOT in any way a basis for your inner health).

There was an evaluation done beforehand so you would know which program you're gonna take. Let's not push for what society tells us to be. You own your body, what you'll do with yourself is STILL your choice.

Yun lang. ❤